Skye Soon
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Remember I was feeling terribly out of it and 100% sian? Well, I found out how to get rid of it!!!

Turns out the solution is easier than I thought.

All I needed...was a little human connection and some fresh air. 

Simple but it worked. Lol.

Finally stepped out of the house for work and to run errands. Smiles just look different up close versus on a screen! Here's a smile for you, btw :)

I also had my first meal outside - mee pok dry. Lol. Bought snacks from Daiso and the Korean mart. Say yay to Barley Tea! (Is $6ish normal for 30 sachets?)

Every shopkeeper I met was very warm and friendly too - looks like I'm not the only human feeling happy to see other (weak ties) humans? Haha. Even the bus drivers seem nicer. 

In the recent years I thought I had become more of an INFP instead of my original ENFP. I guess I'm more of an ENFP after all! It was so incredibly nice to go out to work and meet people face to face. 

Just a thought. You know how generally introverts are said to prefer having just a few close friends? Well, speaking from an "extrovert" point of view, I love having many close friends, AND also love connecting with friends that I'm not so close to! To call them acquaintances is way too formal - these are usually friends I've once hung out with/ classmates / schoolmates but are not in my core group. It's great because everyone kind of has their own core group and we're not looking for someone to be 'besties' with or to HTHT with all the time. We just wanna connect and talk about a common interest. I love that! I'll just face it, I'm an extrovert at heart but I act like an introvert. Haha. 

(You know if you are my core group or not with the high frequency + randomness of my texts)

I won a $5 Cathay voucher from submitting Coke can tabs, so I redeemed a medium popcorn! Had to top up $3, but wow, it has been maybe 2 years since I've even stepped anywhere close a cinema. A sweet feeling indeed. Thanks, Coke!

Caught this movie (at home) too!

It's a Pixar animation called Luca, about sea creature boys heading for an adventure in the land monster world. Simple but heartwarming storyline. Top notch animation as usual. 

Themes: Friendship, courage, acceptance. 

Here are some snaps.


This starting scene gave me intense Little Mermaid vibes. 


We love doofus fish. 

Didn't really snap anything from after they went up to town - I'll leave that for you to discover.

Found this article talking about how Ghibli has permeated Western animation! HOW THE TABLES HAVE TURNED!

This little tidbit is very fun too:

"And, most of all, the coastal setting brings to mind Miyazaki’s 1992 film Porco Rosso, a story of seaplanes and piracy set in 1930s Italy. Luca’s village is even named “Portorosso” in homage."

Other things I watched: 
  • 1 episode of Move To Heaven
  • 1 episode of Sweet Tooth 
  • Rewatched 'Your Name' (Dang, the visuals are 200% awesome.)
  • Minari 
  • Cruella
  • Isi and Ossi (This is in German! Accidentally watched it in dubbed at first but luckily I found out and switch ASAP. Their original voices are much better.)
Oh yes!! I'm going to start exploring more foreign language films now, since there's nothing else much in English I want to watch. Mmm.

Hope you guys are having a good week so far!

Cheerios,
Skye

Hey guys!

What's up? How are you guys combating the boredom or the feeling of 'languishing'?  Life feels at a standstill and every day I feel like I'm waiting, and waiting for something that never comes. (Being really bad at living in the present.)

Some lil updates from me.

Finally left the house to celebrate my friend's birthday! This blueberry rose tart is from Pâtisserie CLÉ. The floral notes really added a new dimension to the simple (but well made) tart!

We had fun catching up, roasting each other and tried to hold 'deeper' conversations with the help of some convo cards. 

My friend made a pandan-infused gin cocktail! Yummms! Full marks for presentation and for the fresh pandan leaf. (Not my hand. Thanks YT.)

Also got my first dose of the Covid-19 vaccination. Everything was very orderly and efficient, but every doctor has their own style of doing things.

My doc told me

  • to avoid raw food
  • to take a deep breath on the count of 3 (is this to distract me?) 
while my sister's doc told her 
  • to not exercise for a week (though the booklet said no strenuous exercise for 12-24h)
  • and ice the area if needed
The jab was a small one and hardly hurt. My arm did feel sore though, especially later at night. The next day I could lift my arm but it hurt so I just iced it a little.

Also for ladies, they asked your last menstruation date as you *may* unwittingly be pregnant. This vaccine wasn't tested on pregnant people! (Who would volunteer???)


Other going-ons in life... my mother unknowingly bought me a funny snarky shirt for $3 at the market. She didn't read any of the text. My sister has one that says 'PARTY ANIMAL'. Lmao.


I finally understand why people watch gamers on YouTube. For me, the community is fun and the videos are useful. I learned how to skip a whole part of the quest by sneaking around the temple grounds instead of fighting the enemies HAHAHA. Also, I was very lucky and got three characters in one pull! Insane! Enjoying my first RPG still. I am now at Adventure Rank 28, and I main Traveller and Chong Yun, though I'm building Jean too. Sorry my dear Qiqi, claymores are just more useful to me...


Also sampled more Netflix dramas like Sweet Tooth and Move to Heaven. There are so many post-apocalyptic shows nowadays. 

I'm also gonna be heading out of the house for work starting tomorrow. Mixed bag of feelings but mostly glad I think! 

Hope you guys are doing ok. Leaving with an old song called If Tomorrow Never Comes.

 


Love,

Skye


Perfect World
Released: 2019
Country: Japan
Available on: Netflix

Perfect World is a series about a romance between a woman and her first love/crush, who is wheelchair bound after a terrible accident. 

I learned a lot from this show.

  • How people do not know how to react to and treat people who are disabled
They don't know where to look, what to talk about, or how to offer help without acting different. 


They often have to explain themselves and put the new person at ease. What a load of emotional work! 
People are also afraid that they will offend them in some way, so maybe they just avoid this whole problem by not befriending them in the first place. 

Difficulties faced:
  • Physical difficulties are the most visible problems. The government and big organisations target these areas the most because of its visibility. Of course, it's not always enough. People tend to leave out this group of people because it just doesn't cross their mind to be more inclusive.

You have to put down your pride and often ask for assistance. Most people offer help readily but it just sucks having to ask and rely on others.


I am swaku so I have never seen this sort of car before. It is operated by hand.


Emotional
This is definitely less visible but way more difficult to overcome.

  • Humiliation
Itsuki is paralysed chest down and can't feel anything, including when he needs to pee or poop. He feels that he is not enough and a burden to others and therefore vows never to date or fall in love. 


  • Helplessness
At the start, Itsuki wanted to die. He was a popular, smart, athletic person who after the accident could not even turn himself. He had to use a catheter. He could not even strangle himself because his muscles were too weak.


Later, he feels helpless when he cannot protect his girlfriend or do 'simple' able bodied things for her (like helping her when she's injured). 

Societal
  • In the show, the girl's parent is a social welfare worker. All is well when showing care towards others, but when it comes to your own daughter dating a wheelchair bound man? Dad vehemently says no and even dramatically kneels and begs the boy to break up with her, because he 'wants a stready and reliable' man for his daughter.

  • Same goes for dating. All is well until they see the prosthetic leg or wheelchair. Then they start to treat you different.
Caregiving guilt and stress

As caregiving will entail some kind of medical knowledge, new caregivers may feel stressed because they don't know what to do. They can't be there 24/7 and when accidents happen when they're not around, they blame themselves. 

Plus it doesn't help even when you have the determination, energy and enthusiasm to do caregive... when your devious love rival is his professional caregiver who often puts you down and scolds you.

Furthrermore the person whom you are caring for may reject you because of feelings of insecurity and not wanting to be a burden. It's emotional assault from all sides!!!



The nurse also kissed him when he was asleep! WHAT THE HECK!!

If you're the caregiver, your devotion is also questioned by others like your family and friends. 

"Why him? It's so much trouble," they say. "You can find someone better."

Watching the show can be so heartbreaking. 

Also, this is the second series that I've watched recently where the MC receives a wedding invitation from their ex that dumped/cheated on them. THE HORROR. How dare they!! 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There are just so many obstacles a person has to overcome, and it doesn't help when people say things like 'you're so inspiring' or 'you're so brave'. I can understand why it sounds so patronising...

I don't have any wheelchair-bound friends so this show has definitely taught me a lot. I haven't really finished the show but from the short episode blurbs, it seems like they are going to face even more problems as a couple but it shoulddddddd be a happy ending??? 

We'll see!

By far one of the more serious dramas I have watched in a while. It is an important show though, made with utmost sincerity and I hope more can watch it to learn how we can be kinder. 

Love,
Skye

Hey guys!

Recently I watched this Thai movie called 'Happy Old Year'. It's about a girl called Jean, decluttering her house, and in the process going through some emotional growth and struggle. 

The goal was to get from this cluttered space:

To this:




It's a crazy clean aesthetic, and you have to throw A LOT of stuff to get here.  And if you want to throw away things, especially sentimental things, you have to be HEARTLESS.

 Jean steels herself to start wading through things and getting rid of them. 

But it's a huge nostalgia trip anyway.

It kind of is, don't you think?



Sometimes it's hard to keep CDs because I don't even have a CD player on my laptop anymore. Honestly I just stream music nowadays.


We don't use them, but at least they are immortalised forever in this film! Also, mega props to the props team for finding all these old things.


Jean starts to hit roadblocks, like having second thoughts. 


Her friend is hurt because she threw away her gift. Jean shares her rationale, and later gets dealt a similar blow when her brother dumps one of her handmade gifts. Oof.


So she starts to return them to their owners. Sometimes she has happy reunions, sometimes she get rebukes. You also start to see how Jean is kind of a selfish asshole to everyone around her.

She meets her ex whom she dumped in a very terrible way to return him some stuff. She apologises and ends up in tears.You don't feel any sympathy for her because how he got dumped was brutal.


She also meets his current GF. Wearing her old shirt. Awkward tension. 


Decluttering is emotional work, mostly because objects get imbued with meaning. 



Jean is someone who does not like to apologise. After she finally learns to say sorry, she is frustrated because she is not always forgiven. 

One of the dramatic scenes in the movie:

Her ex confronts her and tells her that sometimes barging back into someone's life just to say sorry for your own closure is not a great idea. 



It's true, isn't it? Time doesn't heal all. Saying sorry is one small step but maybe silence is better. 

Her ex is saying all these things in the subtitles. Watch her frustrated, shocked face. 




Jean tries to explain that all she wanted to do was say sorry. She didn't mean to hurt him even more.


But her ex says if you really love someone, you let them be.



What do you think? 

I do agree sometimes when you dredge up old things in the past, you are getting closure for just yourself. Often, in the same stroke, you hurt the person once more because they now have to remember what you did and the hurt you caused them. THEN they still have to find some kind of grace and magnanimity in them to forgive you. Just because you finally decided to say sorry? 

So...what I think is that if you want to apologise, do it sooner than later. If it festers for too long, just drop it and move on. The other party may have moved on too, don't disturb their peace.

I'm the kind of person who likes to show love, but in that regard I have now stopped myself because although taking a first step to rekindle friendships is easy for me, the effort and willingness to sustain the friendship is not. In other words maybe sometimes I want the connection but cannot offer enough effort to sustain it. So now I just don't start it at all. I guess my 'care' is a selfish one.

After all, everyone has different demands of friendship. Some may want a deep bond, with daily interactions, while others just want to have a casual chat and check-in once in a while. The difficulty is matching these expectations without anyone getting hurt.

For example, I used to write a ton of notes, letters and birtdhay cards to my friends and classmates. I'm fine with going the extra mile. However, some of them felt pressurised to reciprocate. It makes them feel guilty that I remembered them but they did not remember me/my birthday. I don't feel any offence honestly lol I just wanted to say 'hello, how are you, hope you are well.' But maybe not like chat every day. It's a 'Great if we talk, fine if we don't' kind of attitude. Maybe it's selfish though. 

Over time I have learnt to be more measured so no one feels this burden... We all have limited time and energy and want to reserve it for our most precious ones. An intruder may not be welcome. 

 Anyone out there feeling the same?!



This movie is under the Romance category for some reason but I feel it's way more about self-growth, relationships with others and drama. Not lovey dovey at all. 

The ending is rather open, but hopefully Jean learned her lesson and starts to become a better human being. (Us as viewers too.) It's a slow, plodding kind of movie so don't be going expecting action or many laughs! 

What I learned: Treat people properly with care. Learn to be a better human being. Let sleeping dogs lie. (Or maybe test the water first)

And yes, if you're wondering, Marie Kondo and her show does come up in the movie. 

Movie: Happy Old Year
Released: 2019
Country: Thailand
Genre: Drama
Available on Netflix.

Trailer:


Enjoy :)

Love,
Skye
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Skye Soon : lifestyle blogger in Singapore, street busker and enthusiast of chocolates and books

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